Okay, God. I am back. Thanks for allowing Faux News to continue the interview. When these interviews hit the mainstream media, we will be really famous!

Silence

Yes, forgive me. You already are famous.

But I still have a lot of questions, and here is my first one: Man was created in your image, right?

Silence

Okay, “human beings were created….” I need to be more sensitive here, “politically correct,” as they say, but being created in your image is what it says in the Bible– Genesis 1:26-27 and a bunch of other places in the Bible too. So if man–I mean, if humans are created in your image, doesn’t that imply that you look like us? What I mean is that if we look like you, then wouldn’t it figure that you look like us? So I have a check list that I am going to go over, and really all I need is a yes or no answer: First, do you have two eyes?

Silence

Nose?

Silence

Two ears?

Silence

Mouth?

Silence

Two arms, hands, and five fingers each?

Silence

Legs, feet, toes?

Silence

And here is a sensitive one: skin color. We humans tend to have problems accepting people with a different skin color. And are you really a “he” and not a “she” or even an “it.” And why is that? And how tall are you anyway? I could keep going….

Silence

God, why aren’t you answering any of these questions on my check list? I know your patience is wearing thin but….

Silence

What do you mean that I am missing the whole point?

Silence

You mean that I have it backwards? That man–I mean humans— came up with the idea of how you look based on how we look?  In other words it’s vice versa?

Silence

Okay, I understand that these questions sound like I am a skeptic, but do not take it personally. Do not think for a moment that I do not believe in you and trust you. Sure, I have had my doubts every now and then, especially when I do not hear from you for a period of time.  I get antsy. I know that you are busy with a lot of things, lots of calls to answer, and it could be a bandwidth issue, but still.  Hey, I am talking to you right now, and that is good enough for me. Count me as a believer.  How you look is really not an issue. 

But I would not mind asking, if you don’t mind: if you do not look like us, then whom do you look like?

Silence

What do you mean that I just fail to get it? Yes, I know that you created the universe about 15 billion years ago and that there are trillions and trillions of stars and planets and that the Earth is just one small spec of sand in an endless desert, a drop of water in a vast ocean…I know that there are lots of things we will never understand and are not supposed to understand.

Silence

Why do you say that we humans on Earth are incredibly planet-centered and small-minded by thinking that we  are the only intelligent life in the universe and that all the other stuff you did is for naught? That we think we are the center of everything? Of course we respect all the hard work you have done and we are grateful for it. On a clear night away from city lights there is nothing better than gazing up at all your handiwork.

Silence

Okay, maybe saying we humans are examples of “intelligent life” is an overstatement, but still we have somewhat advanced brains, and we can’t help asking all these questions about why. Why is life the way it is? Why do we die?  Is there life after death? Why do awful things happen to good people? Why is evil alive and well on this planet …?

Silence

No, God, I am not really complaining. The fact is I love it here. As I think I have told you, I think you did a really good job; and while maybe the planet Earth is not as perfect as it might be, I can’t think of another world I would rather live in. In fact I would go as far as to say that if everything were perfect here, it would be pretty boring. I am just trying to get more information for our readers. There are a lot of readers who ask  these questions and would love to hear the answers.

Silence

Yes, you are right, God, we humans have been asking these questions from time immemorial. But are there no answers? No definitive ones? 

Silence

So what you are saying is that this is the nature of life as we humans know and experience it. There are definitive answers, but these answers are beyond our capacity as human beings on the planet Earth to understand fully.  When we humans try to make these answers definitive, it often just confuses things and leads to bad things happening like religious intolerance and hatred of people who do not believe the same thing I believe or someone else happens to believe? I get that.

Silence 

Thank you, God, for your thoughtful answer; and yes, I know that this does not get me off the hook. I should not give up. I should not keep trying. I should keep asking these important questions because, as you say, it is part of being human. And I really appreciate it when you say that you aren’t holding this against me. And as you suggest  I should keep my eye on the ball as to the clues you have given us along the way and still give us humans.  These clues will be the subject of my next interview.